Ligia Oliver, Autor en Baby Creysi

About Ligia Oliver

Productora de radio, cine y TV, copywriter, correctora de estilo, traductora, guionista (publicitaria, cinematográfica, televisiva), reportera o entrevistadora en el formato que sea necesario para generar audiencia; ya sea en campañas publicitarias o temas diversos, basándome en estrategias creativas que permitan posicionar una marca, un programa, un texto, un argumento, etc. Desarrollarme en proyectos editoriales, publicitarios, cinematográficos, televisivos, radiofónicos, de relaciones públicas, contacto de prensa o estrategias de marketing en Redes Sociales. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_EeR2RBF7A&feature=youtu.be

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Let’s learn to recognize the emotional wounds of childhood

Posted on 21/05/2021 - 13:30 by Ligia Oliver

“During childhood, we experience events that can cause pain, sadness, anger or fear. If we aren’t able to resolve them at the time, these feelings can remain lodged in our body and mind, for many years, and generate an emotional wound”, explains Brenda Esparza, teacher in family therapy at the Municipal Institute of the Family (IMF), of Durango.

For the psychotherapist, in childhood we are exposed to physical injuries when we fall down and scrape our knees. But also to emotional wounds, “which sometimes do not heal in a lifetime and can leave deep pain in the child and later in the adult”.

Emotional wounds need time for healing

Like a physical wound, an emotional wound needs time for healing, because if it is not cared properly, in the long run it will continue to cause pain, explained the expert in the discussion “The Wounds of childhood”, organized by the System of Comprehensive Protection of Girls, Boys and Adolescents Durango.

Emotional wounds begin in childhood and are often caused by primary caregivers like Mom and Dad. This means that the experiences we live during these stages of our life will mark our way of feeling, thinking and acting

We recommend: Phrases that destroy children’s self-esteem

According to the survey on “Violence in Early Childhood”, carried out by the Guardians organization, half of the parents had emotional wounds generated in their childhood, and there are still those who have not been able to resolve them.

The five wounds of childhood

If you do not want your children to suffer or live with pain, it is very important that you recognize the emotional wounds you have grown up with, but, above all, that you try to carry out a therapeutic process to heal them.

Once you have identified those prints that marked you, you will need to resolve them so as not to hurt your children.

“We adults have the obligation to heal these wounds, since the mental health of the children will depend on us and our upbringing”, says family therapy teacher Nora Esparza.

Below, we briefly describe these five childhood wounds and explain how they may be harming you and your children, as discussed in the aforementioned discussion.

Abandonment. Physical or emotional abandonment in children can generate anguish. If they grow up with this injury, when they become moms or dads, they will not be able to take care of themselves, they will be dependent and toxic, and use their children to fill their own emotional voids.

Rejection. This wound begins in pregnancy and in the first years of life. When the pregnant woman experiences emotional and economic deficiencies, the baby feels them. Parents who experienced rejection find it difficult to show affection to their family. The child will have many emotional deficiencies because he does not feel important a nd taken into account.

Humiliation.This wound is closely related to feeling shame for our own family. In childhood, the adult felt himself an unworthy person, and they may have been abused. They are indulgent fathers and mothers, who do not set limits and often carry the problems and responsibilities of their sons and daughters. To hide their wound of humiliation, parents are going to protect their children.

Treason. When a child perceives a father or mother anxious and incapable of giving him peace, his uncertainty and anguish grow. As an adult, they will wear invisible masks to protect themselves. They are authoritarian and controlling parents, so they must work on being more flexible and respecting their children in the way they do things.

Injustice. These adults had in their childhood a rigid upbringing and polarized positions: the good and the bad, the right and the wrong. As parents, they are severe and demanding. They want their children to have adult attitudes. They also have a hard time being warm and empathetic; and they condition their love to their children.

“Time does not heal wounds. Therefore, it is important to solve them in the present. Otherwise, there will be injured children in adult bodies”.

Brenda Esparza, psychotherapist

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version

How to recognize if your kid is “High Demanding”

Posted on 05/05/2021 - 13:30 by Ligia Oliver

High Demanding children are those boys and girls who have difficult temperament and, as its name says, “they demand too much attention”, explains psychotherapist Paulina López Benítez, from R&A psicólogos center.

For Paulina, MD in Psychology and expert therapist in child and adolescents, temper is a characteristic we are born with. It doesn´t have to do with education or the way we are raised, but with the traits of the character and the innate way of being of a person.

Every child demands its parents’ attention, and it is not about labeling them, but recognize that they´re young and they have more needs than other children.

The North American pediatrician William Sears proposed the term “High Demanding Children”, after the birth of his fourth daughter, who has a very difficult temper.

We recommend you to read: All children throw tantrums, and it’s normal.

Characteristics of these Little ones

After a baby is born, its parents or its caretakers will notice if they are in front of a “High Demanding Child”, because some specific characteristics will be very notable at a daily family interaction.

This situation could be exceedingly difficult to handle because, these kids, sometimes are judged as spoiled or without limits.

López Benítez points out that, among the main features of High Demanding Children we could find:

Ask for more attention from their parents. They need mom or dad attention all the time, practically 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and this could be very exhausting because they insist, pull you, throw a tantrum or thrown themselves on the floor.

They’re in constant motion. We’re talking about children with a lot of physical activity and need to move all the time. They’re restless! It seems that they can’t sit still five minutes at a time.

Need a lot of physical contact. They cry if you’re not carrying them, they need to be hugged or patted on the shoulder all the time. “They demand a lot of physical contact”.

Skin-deep sensibility. They live their emotions very intensely. They’re very sensitive to criticism and assume situations very personally. Also, they have difficult in expressing their emotions.

For his part, psychologist Alberto Soler points out that all children demand attention, so he doesn’t understand the utility of this term, because, “there have always been calmer or easier-tempered babies, and more demanding or more difficult-tempered ones”.

However, the expert recognizes that some babies are more demanding than others, and that there even could be some extreme cases that push their parents to the limit, but, “when this label is used to describe more than half of the babies, I think it loses its raison d’être”.

We recommend you to read: what if my partner doesn’t set limits to our kids?

What to do?

If you have noticed that you have a High Demanding Child, psychologist Paulina López Benítez offers you six strategies to manage this situation:

Accept your child just the way it is. Before a baby is born, parents already have expectations of how they’d like their child to be. Sometimes the ideals of parents are very rigid. A child is an individual and unique being who will have his own characteristics.

Never compare your child. This is the most frequent mistake that parents make, and it can impact seriously bad in its self-esteem. Avoid comparisons among brothers, cousins, friends, neighbors.

Teach your kid to do its activities alone. Try to make your child independent as it grows. Motivate it to make some activities on its own while you’re working.

Set limits. This implies that there will be consequences due to his/her behavior, which must be consistent and coherent (the consequences). Careful, boundaries are not about being an authoritarian or violent parent.

Avoid saying the word NO. Instead of overwhelming or limiting your child, give it options among things it can do, and try to negotiate.

Try that your child does a physical activity, it will bring a lot of benefits in a physical and emotional level. It will help the child to get tired and, when night comes, could easily fall asleep.

This situation could be very difficult to manage because sometimes they are judged as spoiled or limitless kids.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version: Here

We recomend you to read: Risks of being a “soft” mom or dad.

What to eat and what to avoid if you are breastfeeding

Posted on 03/05/2021 - 13:30 by Ligia Oliver

By: Nutritionist Raquel Pérez de León

The World Health Organization (WHO) recommends exclusive breastfeeding for six months. Most women can breastfeed without any problem; however, as in pregnancy, it is necessary to take care of your diet.

Feeding your baby on demand ensures that he gets everything he needs throughout the day to be healthy and grow well. This means that the volume of milk will not be affected by what you eat; yet, its composition can be altered.

So, if your dietary fat intake is deficient, the concentration of fatty acids in milk will also be low. And the same happens with some minerals such as selenium and iodine, vitamins A, D and B complex. In general, the content of carbohydrates, proteins, calcium and iron is quite constant regardless of the mother’s diet.

According to the Official Mexican Standard 043:

A complete diet is one that includes all nutrients. To achieve this, it is important to include in each meal, at least one food from each group of the Plato del buen comer (Plate of Eating Well):

Fruits and vegetables. All kinds and fresh ones. Remember to vary the colors, as each color of fruit or vegetable provides different vitamins and minerals.

Legumes and foods of animal origin. This includes high-quality proteins, such as meat, chicken, fish, eggs and legumes (beans, broad beans, lentils, chickpeas).

Avoid refined flours and opt for healthier carbohydrates such as brown rice, corn tortillas, oatmeal and whole wheat bread.

Fats are also important. Do not forget to include them in your diet, especially vegetables: avocado, olive oil, almonds, peanuts and walnuts.

Experts from the Mayo Clinic recommend a diet that is as varied as possible, since the consumption of different foods during breastfeeding will change the taste of breast milk but, this will teach your baby different tastes, which can help him accept solid foods more easily later on.

We recommend: What should I eat during my pregnancy?

Avoid These Foods While Breastfeeding

A cup of coffee a day may be safe; however caffeine can pass into breast milk and if you drink more than two or three cups, your little one could have trouble sleeping.

No level of alcohol is considered healthy for your baby. If you happen to drink any alcoholic beverage, you would have to wait at least four hours. If you don’t let that time pass, the alcohol in your blood will pass into your breast milk.

You should only avoid the one that contains high concentrations of mercury, especially swordfish, tilefish, shark and mackerel, as they can be dangerous for the development of the baby.

Adequate energy intake and a balanced diet that includes fruits, vegetables, and animal products help ensure that women face pregnancy and lactation without deficiencies.

Spanish Association of Pediatrics

Water, vitamins and minerals

Water represents between 85 and 95% of the total volume of breast milk. Studies have shown that forcing fluid intake will not increase milk production. Of course, you will be thirstier and you will need to drink more water than before: around three liters a day.

It is important that you know that even if you take care of your diet, it is very difficult to meet all the vitamin and mineral requirements for your health and your baby’s.

It is best to continue with the multivitamin that you have taken during pregnancy. Consult it with your doctor, but remember that this will only be to complement your diet; you must eat varied, adequately and balanced.

Get down to it and recover your weight

Did you know that to produce 100 ml of milk you need 85 kilocalories? During pregnancy your body accumulated extra fat reserves, which will serve as energy for this new stage.

If you eat right, breastfeeding can help you recover your weight. A healthy woman can lose up to a pound a week and, in turn, supply enough milk to support a growing baby. If you submit to rigorous diets, the only thing you will achieve is that your body has no energy and you stop lactating.

Now you know, focus on making healthy decisions and eating a complete, sufficient, balanced and varied diet.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version: Here

We recommend: How do I return to my weight after giving birth?

From closed hands to fine motor skills

Posted on 03/05/2021 - 09:30 by Ligia Oliver

Have you noticed that newborns have their hands clenched? In the first months of life it is normal that a baby has his hands closed. Little by little, as the weeks go by, he will begin to open them.

A baby’s hands play an important role in his development because they are parts of his body that they will discover from a young age. “First he will observe them, then he will open and close them, and he will make movements as if he wanted to reach objects”, explains Belén Hernández Zamora, an instructor at the Kangu Stimulation Center.

For the preschool education graduate, even though a newborn can’t pick up objects, if you caress his palm, he’ll try to grab your finger. He can even squeeze it tightly for a few seconds. This grip is known as the palmar grasp reflex.

By the second month of age, finger movement will still be limited and his hands may still be clenched into tight fists. However, “His hands will draw his attention more and more. He may spend a lot of time trying to move them in front of his face where he can see them. After many tries, he will likely be able to get them into his mouth”, according to the American Association of Pediatrics (AAP).

Development of the fine motor skills

During his first few months of age, a baby is growing and maturing in various ways. “If you notice that he does not move, that he is rigid and stiff, and does not open his hands, you should consult a specialist to rule out neurodevelopmental problems”, says Belén Hernández, an expert in early and prenatal stimulation.

Visual tracking, grasping and manipulating games, among others, will help babies develop fine motor skills.

During your baby’s first three months, it is recommended that you open and close his hands gently, massage the palm in a circular motion, open each little finger and caress his little hands with soft and rough textures.

Similarly, so that babies do not have their hands closed for a long time, UNICEF recommends:

Rub the newborn’s hands with your fingers, from the pinky finger to the wrist.
With your thumb and forefinger, take the baby’s fingers one at a time from the base and slide to the tip, giving a gentle tug at the end.
To help him open his hands, rub the base of his hand outward with a brush or towel, extending his thumb.
If he opens his hand wide, but can’t hold an object, help him by curling his fingers around it.
Place a rattle in his hand and help him shake it several times so he tries to imitate the movement. Check that he doesn’t hit himself.
Get him used to being on his stomach for a few minutes so that he can tear or scratch the covers.

Stimulate him according to his rhythm

As your baby grows, you must motivate him to do new things, but always through games and respecting his rhythm.

“At first, when he can pick up an object of his interest, the baby will have a raking grasp, that is, he will grab things by opening his whole hand and occupying all five fingers”, says Hernández Zamora.

To stimulate fine motor skills and help your baby pincer grasp, the expert suggests:

Between four and six months: place toys in front of his face that attract his attention to make him take them with his hands; you can give him a rattle so that when he moves it, he makes a sound.

Between seven and nine months: play with a big ball and invite him to throw it with his hands. Offer toys to pass from one hand to the other and try to get him to pull ribbons from a box.

Between 10 and 12 months: make him put objects in and out of a bucket or a wide-mouthed jar. Have him put seeds into a small-mouth jar. Let your baby play with modeling clay or play dough.

*Find all the clothes your newborn needs to be comfortable and safe in our Online Store.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

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Spending time with your children is EVERYTHING

Posted on 28/04/2021 - 09:30 by Ligia Oliver

In these times –with the pandemic included– we adults are prisoners of the clock, of saturated agendas, of endless meetings, of solving due things here and there, of being connected to our devices “all day long”, of living under a stress that does not let us in peace, sometimes, even on weekends.

Sadly, we are so adapted to these scenarios that we have made them part of our lives, and “we don’t even have time” to question whether that is right or not.

LET’S STOP!

This should not be considered as something normal for the complete family because, without realizing it, with such a full agenda we are interfering with the kids’ proper development.

It is in their childhood when they need our time, our presence, a full and loving accompaniment –that is, without cell phones– and we are NOT giving it to them.

Let’s do a memory exercise.

Try to recall, did you spend part of your day to play with your children yesterday? To do school or household chores together? To chat about their interests, doubts or simply comment on the moment?

Now, how much time did you spend on it? Although that is not the correct question, I asked it that way because we adults tend to quantify everything in invested minutes or hours.

Perhaps your answer was, “half an hour”, “20 minutes”, “40 minutes”, “two hours”, is that correct?

Well, let me tell you that if you managed to put a number on time, it’s because you don’t have –we don’t have, myself included– the full awareness that children don’t just need a few minutes or hours a day from us: the MORE time we dedicate to them, THE BETTER!

Why?

Because the more time we spend with them, their cognitive, emotional and social development will be enhanced.

We recommend: Mindfulness for children (and for the whole family).

Psychologist Alberto Soler, co-author of the book Happy Children and Parents. How to enjoy parenting and author of the video blog Píldoras de Psicología has made some reflections regarding the time we spend with our children; they are so blunt that I have no doubt that many parents, like me, will think a lot about it:

“Why do we expect our children to settle for the crumbs of our time if they deserve so much more?”

And he continues his reflection (here) saying that “they don’t need so many toys or extracurricular activities, what they need in their first years of life is US”.

Quality time: a misleading concept

The more time we spend with our son and daughters, the better. In this sense, the expert considers that the concept of “quality time” is misleading, “It calms our conscience and leads us to a conformist attitude”, he says.

They just want time…

And it’s true, we shouldn’t settle for just giving them, I don’t know, 30 minutes a day, even if it’s of the “super highest quality”, ha. The really important thing is that we are with our children whenever we can, “They don’t want little quality times, they just want TIME WITH US”.

Our sons and daughters are not to blame for our haste: they need us to spend time with them. And the more, the better.

And without a doubt, all the time we can have with them –beware, here it is super important that we seek to accommodate our life schedules prioritizing the well-being of all– it obviously has to be of quality, because it is useless to be close to them like statues, absentminded, without participating in their enjoyment, learning and joy.

Reflect, prioritize, reorganize…

Nobody said that parenting was easy, much less in a world that drags us in its frenzy, that makes us forget that awareness of the actions that are positive, and those that are not, for our children.

A few weeks ago, I realized that my work schedule was not compatible with my son’s needs and I had to define priorities. I had a sea of projects on me that were preventing me from enjoying dinner time or playing with him. I paused and reorganized.

Leave some things out…

I had to leave things out and adjust schedules, and you don’t know how good it has been for me to have the evening, almost complete, for my son –and him, of course–. There are days when it is completely impossible for me to shut the computer down at 6:30 pm, but they are less and we talked about them before.

Just an idea…

Last week, in the evening, when I had finished my work and he had done his homework, we spent about two hours –I tell you, again the concept of time– having great fun in his little wooden house telling stories, playing music, dancing and playing with his plush animals.

His father arrived and joined the party. Night fell and not only was my son the happiest: we were too.

We recommend: We start shaping our happiness when we wake up.

Then I realized that, undoubtfully, the time we spend with our sons and daughters positively influences their well-being. The psychologist Alberto Soler points out that being present in the lives of our children helps them have:

Fewer behavior problems.

More self-control.

Better academic performance.

Material things or time?

There are two resources that we can give our children, adds the expert, which are material things and time. Due to the dynamics in which we are involved, we have privileged the material things.

In fact, many moms and dads make up for their lack of time with them with objects, toys, and other “prizes”.

My advice…

As a professional mom of a seven-year-old, is not to fill emotional voids with material things.

For me, what is truly important is being part of my son’s life, of his achievements and advances, of his doubts and concerns, of his happiness, which is also ours.

If someone feels guilty for not having time to be with their children as they would like –as I felt a few weeks ago– let this be an opportunity to reflect and change the things that are not satisfying.

Children don’t need too many toys or extracurricular activities: they need mom and dad to spend time with them.

*Nonantzin Martínez is a journalist specializing in lifestyle, parenting, maternity and gastronomy issues. She has been part of the editorial staff of magazines such as Marie Claire, Glamour, Padres e Hijos and Balance, and has collaborated with Good Housekeeping Mexico, Cocina Fácil and GQ México. She is currently an editor for Baby Creysi, an apprentice photographer, and the mother of a 7-year-old boy.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version

I should circumcise my son, shouldn’t I?

Posted on 20/04/2021 - 09:30 by Ligia Oliver

One of the dilemmas that arises when a son is about to be born is about circumcision. To do it or not to do it? That’s the question. In many cases, the decision depends on factors that have nothing to do with the medical one: there are families that circumcise by religious tradition and, in other cases, it has to do with the custom of the father’s family.

The practice of circumcision varies considerably from country to country. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), in Nigeria, for example, 95% of men are circumcised while in Latin American countries it is around 11%. The world average, according to the same organization, is 30%.

What is circumcision?

“Circumcision is a medical procedure that consists of surgically removing the foreskin, which is the skin that covers the glans”, explains pediatrician Jaime Rodríguez, with a private practice in Mexico City.

This practice is usually carried out a few hours or days after the boy’s birth, when their families decide it. It is not recommended to do it immediately in babies who are premature or who have a problem with the penis that would require later surgery.

Last decades

Throughout the last decades there have been -and still prevail- various debates around this practice in the medical field. Some pediatric and health organizations recommend it; others speak against it, except in cases where it is necessary to solve a specific problem (for example, in patients the foreskin does not retract naturally and they present infections and discomfort).

According to the WHO, on average, 30% of men in the world are circumcised.

Pros:

One of the organizations that has spoken out most frequently in favor of circumcision is the American Pediatric Association. For years, these experts have studied the scientific evidence around this practice in newborns and concluded that the main benefits are:

Helps prevent urinary tract infections.
It is one of the factors that could reduce the possibility of suffering from penile cancer.
It helps reduce the spread of sexually transmitted infections

Another group of experts that has spoken out in favor of circumcision is the World Health Organization (WHO); they have ensured that it is an important measure to prevent HIV and recommends it especially in countries where the disease is an epidemic, as it happens in several African nations.

Cons:

“Although organizations such as the American Pediatric Association have spoken in favor, they only recommend it for families who want it, they do not suggest that circumcision be mandatory for all newborns. This is because the evidence on its benefits is not definite enough”, explains Rodríguez.

For other organizations and expert groups, circumcision is an unnecessary practice, since healthy tissue is removed from the body, mainly for social, religious or aesthetic reasons.

“The foreskin is very tight during the first months of life. It is not tight just for the sake of it, this helps protect the glans, for example, so that it does not come into direct contact with the fecal matter that babies leave in their diapers”, says the pediatrician.

According to Rodríguez, some of the benefits of circumcision proposed by certain medical groups can be achieved in other ways.

“It is believed that without the foreskin, infections are prevented; however, with the correct hygiene of the area infections are not possible to happen. On the other hand, recommending it to prevent the transmission of HIV could misinform and motivate many men to have sex without a condom, a measure that is absolutely essential to avoid this disease”, says Rodríguez.

In Mexico, public health institutions do not practice circumcision on a mandatory basis.

The policy says that this should not be done, unless the boy presents a medical problem that requires it. In the end, the decision is yours. Don’t hesitate to ask your child’s pediatrician for guidance.

Circumcision consists of surgically removing the foreskin, which is the skin that covers the glans penis.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version

Postpartum temazcal: an ancestral tradition

Posted on 07/04/2021 - 14:40 by Ligia Oliver

The postpartum temazcal is a Mexican ancestral tradition that exists in different cultures since pre-Hispanic times and has been passed down from generation to generation. According to the Royal Spanish Academy (RAE), this word is of Nahuatl origin –temazcalli– and means “low adobe house where steam baths are taken”.

Currently, although the structural way of performing it has changed, this ritual continues to be carried out in many regions of our country. Women, mainly grandmothers, mothers-in-law, sisters or aunts, are the ones who have been in charge of the postpartum temazcal. “Those are the ones who transmit and pass this ritual from generation to generation”, says María Dolores Sangrador Melchor, a member of the Nanabi women’s cooperative.

The temazcal is a traditional ceremonial and therapeutic steam bath from Mesoamerica. Its origin is pre-Hispanic. It was used by women in labor after giving birth. The purpose: physical and symbolic cleaning.

“The temazcal in the traditional culture of health and Mesoamerican ethnomedicine”, Alfonso Aparicio Mena, Gazeta de Antropología.

A pre-Hispanic ceremony

María Dolores, an herbalist from Tlaxcala, has been performing this ceremony for 15 years. This ritual is inherited from her ancestors, “Doing a postpartum temazcal in a traditional way is a lesson I received from my tribe to celebrate and accompany the woman who becomes a mother and help her find balance”.

In her family, when a woman had given birth, the temazcal was held the day after the birth of the baby. The mother of the new mother went to the mountains to look for the herbs and the man lit the temazcal. A hen was also killed to prepare a broth and serve it hot to the new mom.

In María Dolores’s experience, “The postpartum temazcal helps “the milk let-down” and to remove air bags, as well as to balance the temperature of the woman, detoxify the body and dispose of the residues of some medications that have been used during labor”. Also “the hip bones close and the uterus gradually takes its place”.

Alcina Franch, in her book about the Aztecs, underlines the importance of the temazcal bath after childbirth, “Through the ritual bath, the body and spirit of the woman in labor were cleaned”.

A shelter among women

The great-great-grandmothers, great-grandmothers, grandmothers and mothers, made the postpartum temazcal with the purpose of accompanying the great-granddaughter, granddaughter, daughter or niece, “So that she recognized herself as a mother, was more aware of her motherhood and could enjoy it”, says Leticia Rodríguez Serrano, midwife from the School of Professional Midwives with a Professional Certificate.

She adds that this bath also has the purpose of listening to the woman, the partner, the older children, if there were any. The temazcal can be private, with the family or shared with other women.

“The postpartum temazcal is to give support to women. A support for that new mother who does not know what to do and who feels pain: pain in her body, in her breasts, in her soul”.

Leticia Rodriguez, midwife.

The temazcal offers warmth in all senses: to the uterus and to the body, but also it is a shelter for women: “Listening to them and providing them with support is empowering them to have self-confidence and to be able to have an organic upbringing of the baby”, says the expert, who belongs to the group of midwives and perinatal educators of Ticime Midwives.

How is it done?

The traditional postpartum temazcal is made in a small room and, at a corner, some water is poured over heated volcanic stones causing steam come out. This can be adapted and done at the woman’s home, eight or fifteen days after having the baby. Or, after quarantine.

The only requirement is that, if she had a C-section, she no longer has the stitches. Likewise, a preliminary interview is done to find out if she has high blood pressure or glucose, or some other illness.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish Version

We recommend: The three ‘R’ of childbirth

A gift from nature to girls

Posted on 21/03/2021 - 15:30 by Ligia Oliver

We all expect spring arrival with a lot of joy to forget the cold winter days and have the first vacation of the year with warmth. And not only that: this is a season full of mythological meaning. Visit it again and again with these girls’ names inspired by nature: A gift from nature to girls.

A

Aurora: Its meaning is evident: “Dawn”. It is a name used to augur the beauty and luminosity of the new day. In Roman mythology, Aurora is the deity who personifies dawn.
Azucena: Name of Arabic origin that refers to a beautiful white or pink flower.
Azalea: The beauty of Azaleas flowers is unique. Its origin is Greek and means “Dry”.
Amarilis: Do you know the Amarilis flower? It’s beautiful! So stunning that you could use it as name for your daughter. Its origin is Greek and it transmits great charm.

We recommend: The most used names in Mexico, according to the Inegi

B – C

Begoña: Its meaning comes from a sanctuary at the top of a hill that dominates Bilbao city and nearby towns. It means “Place on the dominant hill” and its origin is Basque.

Camelia: The elegance of Camellia flowers is undeniable. As name, it has a Latin origin. Do you know someone named like that?

Cintia: Cintia’s flower stands out for its brightly yellow. Its origin is Greek and means “She who comes from the mountain”.

F – H – J

Flor: The warm, beautiful, unpredictable, thorny and exceptional “Flower”. Its origin comes from the Latin Florus and means “The one that refers to the floral”. Without flowers in our fields, green wouldn’t be enough.

Hortensia: Even though this name is not really current, it doesn’t lose its beauty. It comes from Latin and its Saint Day is January 11^th.

Jazmín. Have you ever smelled a Jasmine? Its aroma is unique! So much that it can inspire you to call your baby Jasmine or Jazmín. It origin is Persian.

You could read: Baby names that mean Moon

LL – R – S

Lluvia: It means “Rain” and it is used as a poetic and symbolic evocation. Is said that, women named like this “love people who are close to them, who are cheerful and attract success at job”.

Rocío: Andalusian origin, its primal Latin meaning (Rosius) means “She who is refreshing and youthful like dew”. It also means “The one who has grace”.

Rosa: Its meaning is “Rose flower”. The use of this name during the Middle Ages was very common, reaffirmed by the symbolism of beauty and purity attributed to the rose and Virgin Mary.

Silvia: Natural from the forest or queen of nature. It derives from Latin Silva, whose meaning was “Jungle”, “Sinister forest”.

What do you think about these girly names?

If you need more ideas we recomend: Names for girls that are not common, yet v ery beautiful

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Breaking patterns of machismo in the family

Posted on 04/03/2021 - 13:52 by Ligia Oliver

Every day, 137 women are killed by members of their own family and less than 40 percent of women who experience violence seek help, according to figures from the United Nations Women (UN Women).

Feminism has not killed anyone, while machismo kills every day.

This is what Coral Herrera Gómez points out, in her book Men who no longer make people suffer for love. Transforming masculinities, from Catarata publishing house.

The Spanish feminist writer and blogger explains that machismo is an attitude towards life in which men consider themselves superior to women.

Feminism does not seek that women become superior to men, subjugate and dominate them, but rather, “It seeks to end the structures of exploitation that have us serving, caring and loving men”, she says.

She recognizes that feminism is increasing in some societies, but there is still a lot of work to be done because patriarchy is inside our entire political, social, economic, cultural and religious structure.

Feminism is to shift the patriarchy from science, religion, medicine, sports, parliaments, laws, our economy and also our emotions and feelings.

Coral Herrera Gómez, Spanish feminist writer and blogger

Women can be patriarchal too

Patriarchy is a sociocultural system that considers that men should have power and rule over women.

And despite the fact that the female sex suffers from machismo

“Women are also patriarchal because we were born in the patriarchy and have been educated in the patriarchy”, emphasizes PhD in Humanities and Audiovisual Communication Herrera Gómez, who has also been a consultant for gender and communication in organizations such as UNESCO.

The expert points out that…

“From the age of six, girls assume their own gender inferiority, so it is important to free ourselves from those beliefs, empower ourselves and believe that we are worthy of good treatment, and that we deserve all our rights because we are human beings.

We should avoid actions that promote machismo in the home, such as the unequal distribution of tasks.

“Women in the world have double and triple working hours. One outside the home and the other two at home as domestic workers and mothers. And also as caregivers for people with disabilities or dependent family members”.

Breaking those schemes

For the expert in gender theory, the epicenter of machismo is in relationships and in homes, where it is clear that men have twice as much free time as women, this allows men to have a better quality of life.

From childhood…

Girls and boys must be taught to build egalitarian relationships and, “Be able to make their own purple glasses to see the structural inequality of our society”.

Likewise, we must teach women to become aware that love is not suffering, that love must be enjoyed and that it can only be enjoyed in conditions of equality and freedom.

“A social political cultural revolution is needed to end patriarchy, sexism, machismo and above all misogyny”.

“A change in masculinities implies that men assume that they have to carry out the domestic tasks of upbringing and care in the same way as women, that they have to assume their responsibilities because they are members of a household and in this sense it is important to break down the masculine monarchy that makes all men live like kings in their own home”, she points out.

“Love in the couple can be built to achieve healthy, egalitarian and free relationships in which women do not see themselves dominated or subjugated, in which there is mutual care and all the tasks are shared 100 percent”.

Coral Herrera Gómez.

Whether you are a man or a woman, have you said any of these phrases?:

“Crying is just for women”
“Pink is not for men”
“Men are womanizers”
“Washing and cooking are women’s tasks”
“A man is strong and brave”
“You look like a girl”
“Fight like a woman”
Yyou run like a girl”

Begin to break the patterns of machismo by rooting out these ideas.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version: Here

7 tips to avoid crib death

Posted on 24/02/2021 - 09:00 by Ligia Oliver

One of the main fears of mothers of newborn babies is that their son or daughter will be a victim of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), also known as crib death.

Fear is not for free

This disgrace happens without any apparent reason and causes the sudden death of babies under one year of age.

Although there is still no absolute consensus regarding its causes, multiple scientific investigations have pointed out factors that could be related.

Follow the list

A list of recommendations has been elaborated to prevent it based on the evidence provided by the cases studied for decades. Follow them to the letter.

Some clues about its causes

Pediatrician expert Carmen García explains that SIDS “is one of the most known infant deaths and represents 35 to 55% of deaths in this age group. Death, as its name says, is sudden and without apparent cause”.

García points out that this syndrome occurs between two weeks and a year after the baby’s birth, but it is much more frequent in those under four months.

Some data

Over the years, various studies have been carried out to try to determine the causes of this syndrome; however, there are still no solid answers, only indicators, “The causes are still unknown, but it is very likely that it is due to a dysfunction of the nervous mechanisms of cardiorespiratory control.

Babies’ systems have not yet matured enough to solve, for example, suffocation or phlegm”, says García.

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome constitutes between 35 and 55% of infant deaths.

More data

Among the most important findings about the possible risk factors that have been found around the world, according to the American SIDS Institute, are:

Exposure to nicotine, that the baby sleeps on his stomach, that older people share the bed with him and that the child has abnormalities in the brainstem that do not allow him to adequately deal with respiratory events.

7 rules to prevent crib death

There are some measures that can help you prevent this syndrome. Pediatric expert Carmen García offers you the most important recommendations to take care of your baby.

1. Do not miss your prenatal control: Prenatal care is essential to avoid premature birth, one of the factors that are believed to increase the risk of crib death.

2. Your baby should sleep on his back or on his side, in both cases with his head to the side. It is believed that the mattress could obstruct the airway of many babies who sleep on their stomachs and, unable to raise their heads on their own, have suffocated. On the other hand, putting the baby’s head on one side allows the little one to expel phlegm or milk, in case of regurgitation.

3. Use a firm mattress, avoid laying him on mattresses, lambskins or fluffy quilts. This will help decrease any risk of suffocation.

4. Keep the baby’s bed as bare as possible. Also, he should sleep without blankets, bumpers, stuffed animals or cushions. Any of these objects can entangle him and obstruct his breathing.

5. Do not share a bed, ideally your baby should have your own space to avoid the risk of being crushed by adults or other children during sleep. You can use a co-sleeping crib to keep him close to you without putting him in danger.

6. Sleep in the same room. You need to be very vigilant, as his neurological and respiratory systems are not yet mature enough to overcome some events on his own. The appropriate situation is that he sleeps next to you so that you can be as attentive as possible.

7. Do not smoke during pregnancy or close to the baby. Several studies have found a link between smoking and nicotine exposure with crib death. For this reason, it is important that babies are not near smokers and people must not smoke in the baby´s areas, since the nicotine remains impregnated in the objects.

According to research on crib death, SIDS may be related to the position in which babies sleep and exposure to nicotinchokinge.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version: Here

This is the essential skincare for boys and girls

Posted on 22/02/2021 - 17:51 by Ligia Oliver

The skin is the largest organ in the body and has very important functions that help maintain good health: it prevents germs from entering the body, protects us from cold and heat and provides an immune defense. When to start skincare? The answer is: From birth.

“Skincare should start from newborns and continue throughout life”, says Dr. Rossana Janina Llergo Valdez, president of the Mexican Foundation for Dermatology.

To prevent it from being vulnerable to injuries, infections and irritations, the expert shares these three recommendations that we should try on the skin of our girls and boys:

1. The first skincare: Protect it from the sun

Excessive exposure to UV sun rays favors processes of inflammation of the skin, that is, it damages it. And the damage received in childhood affects the skin throughout life. In fact, it is known that by the age of 18, 80% of skin damage is already done.

“From the age of 2 it is advisable to use sunscreen. Although this could be applied from the age of six months, it is not convenient to expose the little ones to such a significant amount of sunlight, such as in the beach because these conditions will easily attack their skin”, emphasizes Dr. Llergo Valdez.

In babies, the production of melanin, a pigment that helps protect us from the sun, is much slower, so it is necessary to take care of their skin from the sun’s ultraviolet radiation.

The skin protector must be of dermatological degree (preferably sunscreens, which have titanium dioxide and zinc oxide in their composition), have a minimum SPF (sun protection factor) of 30, although the ideal is 50, and be resistant to water.

Whether the boys or girls are indoors or outdoors, it must be applied every four hours. If they are in a place that receives significant solar radiation, it must be reapplied every two hours.

Complementing sun protection with clothing (preferably cotton) is very important. It is suggested that they wear long sleeves, a cap or hat, and glasses. For the legs, denim is very useful.

There are clothes with FPS, if you have the possibility to purchase them, this is an extra help.

“By establishing habits of sun protection from childhood, your skin will be healthy and you will have less chance of developing skin cancer in adulthood. We must not forget the fact that the skin has a memory”, says the expert.

2. Skincare at bath time

Skin hygiene is essential. Young and older children should take brief baths, with lukewarm water and neutral soap or syndet dermocleaners, with moisturizing qualities, which are discreetly acidic and respect the lipid layer of the skin so as not to attack it due to frequent use.

The dermatologist Llergo Valdez points out that loofahs or sponges should be avoided, since these objects are aggressive with the skin.

It is recommended to give a gentle massage, only with your hands and soap, without generating friction. In the case of little ones who wear a diaper, it is recommended to clean this area only with soap and water and avoid perfumed wipes, as they could cause irritation.

3. Keep it moisturized

After bathing, pay close attention to drying. It is recommended to do it very well in the area of the folds to prevent moisture from contributing to the reproduction of bacteria and germs.

Right at the end of the bath and drying, you have to apply a moisturizing cream; at this moment the skin will take full advantage of its benefits. The emollient cream should be applied even to newborns.

Pay attention to any alteration

During the first year of life, it is very common that young kids suffer from skin problems. The weather, the environment, the lack of hydration, irritants, genetics, among others, make them prone to inflammatory conditions such as atopic dermatitis, which is characterized by redness, rashes and itching.

“If our children present changes or spots on their skin, we must take them to the specialist and not self-medicate them. When home recommendations are followed, the ointments and medications used can cause irreversible damage”, warns Dr. Llergo Valdez.

To keep our children’s skin healthy, it is advisable to take them for a check-up once a year with a pediatric dermatologist, who will also review their family history to provide preventive care.

The three most common skin conditions in childhood are atopic dermatitis, viral infections such as molluscum contagiosum, and warts.

“It is very important to teach our sons and daughters these good habits and help them understand the need to take care of their skin throughout their life”, explains the current president of the Mexican Foundation for Dermatology.

If there are newborns, infants and young children at home, do not forget to follow the three basic cares mentioned above: short baths, moisturizing the skin and protecting it from the sun.

In adolescence, skincare will change a bit, but based on these, the age in which hormones begin to do their thing will surely not be difficult to cope with, at least in terms of skin.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version

HELP, my kid swears!

Posted on 04/02/2021 - 14:48 by Ligia Oliver

The family is gathered in the dining room when they suddenly hear 4-year-old Lu say a foul word. Her mother looks at her furiously and yells at her not to be rude. Her dad, on the other hand, laughs out loud. Does this scene look familiar to you?

In childhood, boys and girls say rude things without knowing the meaning of those words. There are parents who find it amusing or “funny” to hear them talk like that. Even some family members, such as uncles or grandparents, reward preschoolers for saying them, since they find it funny the way the kids pronounce those words.

When he was five years old, Gabriel remembers that every time his godfather came to visit, he used to pay him 10 pesos to say a bad word, “it made him laugh a lot how I pronounced the swearing. My mom scolded me. So, secretly, my godfather gave me money to repeat it”, says Gabriel, who now tries not to swear in front of his daughter.

Where do kids pick these words?

To prevent your child from saying rude things, child psychologist María Useche Criollo recommends that you tell them, respectfully and without yelling, not to say them, “by not magnifying the situation or giving it much importance, correct the child with respect, and tell him that what he has just said is a foul word, therefore, he should not repeat it”.

For many parents it is a surprise that their daughters and sons say bad words because they assure that they do not use bad language at home. However, we cannot ignore the fact that Mexican society is used to swear at least in 20 different ways in their daily conversations, according to the survey“The Mexican and foul words” by Consulting Mitofsky.

The document shows that young men are the ones who use them the most, especially hanging out with friends.

Specialist Useche Criollo thinks that one of the reasons why boys and girls swear is because they hear foul words within their family or school environment, “primary caregivers have the possibility to control the places the kids visit; therefore, they can specifically determine where they could have heard or learned those words”.

Reactions to “swearwords”

Avoid laughing when they say something rude, otherwise they will continue to draw your attention in this way and understand that it is acceptable behavior. “By using positive reinforcement for negative behaviors, the only thing that will be achieved is to maintain these behaviors over time”, emphasizes the psychologist.

Don’t yell at them or spank them. “Laughter and anger, both extremes, will make a boy or girl continue using bad language to get attention, something very important at this stage of their lives”, says Useche.

Avoid humiliating. they are getting to know the world. Offending them will create negative feelings.

Explain why they shouldn’t say “bad words”. Do it with disposition, good attitude and respect, and set an example by not saying them so that they do not have to use them.

Teach an appropriate word that can substitute the “bad word”.

“Rude Boy!”

Parents should not put labels on our girls and boys. If we tell them “you are rude”, we are damaging the self-image he has of himself.

The expert Useche Criollo recommends going to therapy to evaluate the family context and establish what behaviors, actions or words the kids are imitating, and what modifications in the behavior of parents or caregivers can be made to eliminate the cause of the use of bad language.

If your boy or girl swears constantly, this means that they are growing in an environment where bad language is spoken. Check what happens at home, at school or to the places where he usually goes.

Translated by: Ligia M. Oliver Manrique de Lara

Spanish version

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